last night i peeked in on you when i got home from my extra shift at 2:00 am.
you were laying horizontal in your big bed- sprawled out and breathing deeply.
your bed was full of toys-
your big snow white doll,
your ariel that swims in the pool with you,
the 4 books i read to you before i left for work,
and a bucket full of small toys [princesses, macdo toys, a tiger and a race car]
i stood in your doorway for awhile letting your sweet presence calm me.
i was still amped up from work.
i had just spent 4 hours trying my best to fix an unfixable problem-
too many sick people; not enough nurses, beds or doctors.
the feelings of frustration and ineffectiveness that are my constant companions at work melted away.
and as your fan whirled overhead, i tucked you back under your covers,
kissed your forehead and quietly closed your door.
thanks for being there for me last night.
i needed you.