bedtime is the most favorite time.

bedtime means 'one-two-three' and then a gentle toss into the crib followed by lots of giggles.
then there's a bottle to drink and one last snuggle to have.
off goes the light and on goes the fan and the door shuts quietly.
one down, one to go.

why is bedtime the sweetest and yet the most awful?
nothing sounds more dreamy than moms and dads snuggled in bed with their little kidlets,
reading stories, sharing giggles and enjoying the quiet time.

but the reality is not so picture-perfect.
it's the end of the day, everyone's tired.

there's a lot of:
'pick up those toys, i'm not going to ask again'
and
'go brush your teeth. you know the routine. it's the same every night'
and
'kate, for the love! quit putting your princess dress back on!'

but then the pj's get put on, the teeth get brushed and we gather for our little family prayer.
and then some of that dreaminess drifts in.
we bow our heads and listen to kate's simple prayer.
....'thank thee that mommy and daddy could play with me. thank thee that evelyn could poop and feel better. please bless to sleep well'....

and then i read one book and jank tells one story and there's kisses and hugs and  'i love you's'.
off goes the light and on goes the fan and the door shuts quietly.

photobombed

miss kate:

i was attempting to take a picture of little evie rue the other day when BAM out of nowhere,
you appeared and photobombed every stinking picture.
it's a good thing i think you're so adorable because i could see how a mother who is tired and hungry would think to herself 'grrrrrrr. you're ridiculously annoying sometimes'.

thankfully your mother would never think these types of thoughts.
your mother is always well rested and never cranky so you just carry on with your photobombing.



ps. i always swore i wouldn't dress my kids in princess crap..... this is me eating my words. happens to the best of us.

a friend

kate-

you have been a joy lately.
i don't think i've ever been so enamored with you.
we play silly games and you laugh.
we watch movies and you snuggle with me.
you copy just about everything i do.

playing on our bed is one of your favorite things to do

you're learning so quickly it's startling.
i want time to slow so i can enjoy this phase.
(and i don't think i've ever said that before)


a coworker once told me that it took her 18 months to 'fall in like' with her son.
and i remember thinking-
'that sounds strange, but i bet that's how it'll be for me'

some moms are blessed with the ability to love and like their kids immediately.
i wasn't one of them.

i loved you with all the love in the world from the very beginning,
but i didn't enjoy the baby phase as much as most new moms.
you were fussy and needed constant attention and i didn't know what i was doing or trying to do.
you and i struggled to find our balance.

it seems we have found that balance now.
you and i have become friends.
i like you and you seem to like me.
every night i say to your dad,
'i can't wait to see peanut in the morning'

your hiding spot-

we always find random toys under our pillows

kate, i want you to know these things.
i think it's important for you to know my thoughts and feelings.
and someday when you read this and say to me-
'mommie, why didn't you like me?'
i'll cry and say-
'oh peanut butter, i did like you. i just didn't know it yet'
and then we'll eat chocolate cake.
because that's what friends do.


love,
your mum

.

no, i am NOT a punching bag

katie grace!
(to be yelled firmly in a southern accent)

i used to love running errands.
i once told my mom if i were given a free day to do anything i would choose to accompany someone on their errands.
i am very aware that this is weird.
i just think it's fun to tag-along with someone else and see how they do things and where they go.
(this excludes grocery stores and other boring errands. i only desire fun errands to new places i've never been to)

but my love of errand running ceased once i had you.
the hassle of the car seat when you were a baby was too much for me.
in and out.
in and out.
and you were heavy.
ok, not you per se, but the car seat+you= offta!

i used to say once you were a toddler it would be easier.
you could walk and sit in a cart and all would be merry.
well, about that.... you see, having the ability to walk also means you can run from me.
something you did about ten times yesterday.
my heart stopped beating twice when i thought i lost you.
(turns out you were just petting the fake doggie at old navy)

i handled the running away quite well.
i calmly found you and redirected you to where we needed to go.
it was the hitting me in the face because i wouldn't let you play with the credit card machine at checkout that did me in.
i know you don't completely understand yet how rude it is to smack someone when you don't get your way.
and because of this fact, i forgive you.
but i promise if you start making a habit of it, you will be in timeout until you're two.
don't test me little one.
you get your stubbornness from me and i've got 20+ years of stubborn on you.

you redeemed yourself by being so cute at the bookstore.

ps. love you stinker bum

.

166?... 178?.... ah, screw it

mr. hardgrove:

you taught one of my high school math classes. i didn't learn much. not because you were a bad teacher- it's just that math always made sense to me so i didn't have to work at it. except the other night at work when i had to subtract 4 from 180 and i couldn't figure it out. no joke. i had to ask a coworker to verify and he thought i was insane. 

maybe i am. 

sure feels like. 

let me explain it to you mathematically and maybe it'll make more sense-

(4 molars coming in + the monthly reminder that i am indeed a female) * (sense of dissatisfaction in my parenting skills + husband's constantly changing clinical schedule)  = inability to subtract 4 from 180

hope that simple equation clears it up for you.
thanks for teaching me math stuffs.

ps. sorry i made fun of your fat fingers... but you have to admit it's funny that you can't use a calculator because your fingers hit 4 buttons instead of 1.

.